Bonjour angels,
Xiong, Hua and I started the day at Henderson CC carrying and loading the Chinese New Year goodies up to the vehicles, which were meant to be distributed to 800 over needy families in Singapore. Even though it was tiring, but nevertheless, all of us felt good and heartwarming to be able to contribute our little effort to help these needy families to have a wonderful Chinese New Year 2009. Some even chose to stay back till the late afternoon to help the beneficiaries around Tiong Bahru Estate to carry the goodies back to their home.

This project was organized by Mr. Foo who has been a veteran in volunteering work. Goodies include a packet of 5kg rice, canned food, tidbits and even ang bao packets generously donated by the donors gathered by Mr. Foo. This project was carried out by volunteers who were rotated in 3 shifts. However, due to the overwhelming turnout of 120 over volunteers for the 1st shift which started out on Friday evening, the packing of CNY goodies was completed within 1 and a half hour. As a result, the packing ended very early as expected and the 2nd shift volunteers were not required to turn up as well. According to Jordy, who was one of the co-coordinators for this project, said that one of the volunteers advertised this project through facebook and thus received an overwhelming response from netizens. Most of the volunteers that turned up are from friends of friends or even referral basis. Now we can see the power of online portal.

Of course, the charm given out by our VL elect, Xiong, also attracted lots of enquiries from volunteers (especially females) regarding our services at our home right after the short ice-breaking session. Numbers and emails were exchanged and we will likely be expected a surge in the numbers of volunteers for the coming months.. haha.. :)

Well, the activities at the home were as usual… Due to small turn-up on the number of volunteers, we had a movie screening on Cape No 7. Me and Poh Yan had chess game with the elderly, Hua conducted the card games with the ah mas which were later taken over by Shermin. Uncle Song as usual, taking orders and running errands for the elderly and Xiong was playing mahjong with the elderly. Alex, SK, Rico and Auntie Yen went to befriend the elderly and lend their listening ears.

As for my sharing session.. it will be totally unrelated to volunteering. This was all started out during our explosive discussion and personal chat at a chocolate shop after our dinner.

What is Love? What is Infatuation? What is the different between Love and Infatuation? How do we distinguish our feeling towards Love and Infatuation? Is infatuation the initial emotion that develops the emotion of Love? These were the topics that linger our minds and occupy the main bulk of our conversation. I am surprised by the level of openness within this small group of ours and this makes me get to know my peers better.

To me, infatuation is an emotion or affection towards a person, perhaps only just for a short period of time. Real love involves not only just emotion; it also involves devotion, commitment, responsibility and understanding among the two and it is hard to come by. Well, it is easier to say but when it comes to feeling or emotion, we humans have difficulties in distinguish between these 2, Love and Infatuation? And how do we know he/she is the person that we would like to spend the rest of our lives with? Do we make our sacred vows in front of our family, relatives and friends just because it is part of parcel of our human cycle? Or because of our parents who have been wanted to have grandchildren? Or because we manage to get a flat? Or could it be a moment of emotional impulse? Or could it because we just want to have a companion to spend the rest of our lives with? Or could it be because fate has arrived and we are certain that we are meant to be?

The sharing from one of us had given me a perspective on how we look at this complicated topic differently. This person had a love relationship during his/her younger days. They were deeply in love and had every moment of happiness whenever they were together. However, after so many years of relationship, they got separated. They got separated not because of third party; not because of misunderstanding but because based on mutual consent and understanding that they could not walk any further. They felt that they had nothing to look forward too. They felt that there is no longer any excitement and affection towards each other which they used to experience. Or perhaps they were too comfortable with each other or too much understanding with each other that there wasn’t any more of curiosity on what the person did or encounter during their daily lives. They felt that it will be good to maintain as friends. Eventually, they parted and they maintain as good friends till now.

When we asked this person whether he/she felt lonely at times, he/she replied a straight “no” without any hesitation. It seems like loneliness is never in his/her dictionary. Perhaps because due to his/her background, upbringing and life experiences, he/she has learnt to be very independent. Or perhaps he/she has translated his/her love in volunteering and friendship.

If we really love someone deeply, does it mean we have to own or possess him/her? In my opinion, real/true love does not mean possession. I am inspired by one of our local drama “The Little Nonya”. For those who have watched the drama, the story ended with Yueniang marrying a Caucasian lawyer who has helped her in the past, while the man she loves, Chen Xi marries a mutual friend. It was a sad ending because Yueniang has been strong and self sacrificial all her life and yet did not have a happy ending for herself by being together with the man she loves. Even though, many viewers would like to have Chen Xi and Yueniang together but however, I feel otherwise. I prefer the present ending as it is more realistic. She would not have married Chen as she felt guilty towards Yuzhu who also liked Chen and had her saved from being humiliated by the villain. And if she had married Chen, it might do more harm than good. There is this lyrics of a song from “The Little Nonya” that I particularly like, “爱是一种需要,却不一定要得到, 只要你觉得快乐就好”, “爱是一种需要,聚散却没办法预料, 只能在心里做个记号”.

In real life, people might not end up with their true love. The person you marry might not be the person that you love most. I believe if we really love somebody, we will be willing to make sacrifices in exchange for him/her well-being and happiness even though we might not be together in the end. 不在乎天长地久,只在乎曾经拥有。

It is not easy for a couple to come together and especially to old married couple, who have being together for many many years. Uncle James and Auntie Jane is one of the good examples of a loving couple and I truly admired them. Sometimes I am wondering what makes them stay together so many years and yet so loving. Sometimes, Uncle James will jokingly tell us that he can’t join us for dinner as he has a date with his girlfriend (referring to his wife). Haha.. :) Perhaps this could be one of their excitements that keep them going.

Love is a complicated matter where there is no ten year series answer to that. So for those who are:

Single and have no one in mind – Be happy and do whatever you feel like doing. Channel your love to someone you care most (your family, ah gong ah ma, friends etc), inspire and touch the lives of many others.

Single but have someone in mind – Have the courage to fight and achieve your happiness. Anyway you won’t die for expressing your love to someone that you think you would like to spend your rest of your lives with, right? Haha :)

Married couples and couples in love – Cherish every moment of happiness with your loved ones. There are billions of people around the world. It must be very hard for a couple to come together. Fate must have brought both of you to where you are right now… So do cherish…

As for me, I believe in fate. I believe, no matter where you are, what you do or who you are, somehow or rather, fate will bring the 2 of you together as long as you work hard for it. :)

– 24th Jan 2008 will be a normal activity. Those can come – come… Those cannot come due to spring cleaning, preparing for Chinese New Year – its okay, no obligation. :)

– Xmas 2008 photos are in the gallery. Better late and never.